What is tht smell ?
Find out from Jos Biggs !!
As I stood in the bathroom brushing my teeth I became aware of a distinctly agricultural smell.
That happens at times - it never lasts long nor is too unpleasantly strong, and as the window was open, allowing ingress of outside elements, I took no notice.
Having finished my ablutions I transferred my bulk into the living room, where I sat and enjoyed a cup of coffee. However, the enjoyment was marred by the same smell - it must have followed me on the gentle breeze wafting in from the bathroom window.
My slightly tainted coffee finished I waddled into the kitchen to tackle the washing up. As I stood at the sink I couldn’t help noticing that the smell was even stronger, and no longer ignorable.
The idea entered my brain via my nose that this was not the usual transient manifestation of applied fertilizer - but what was it?
My finger of suspicion pointed at the cats - there had to be a small mouldering corpse somewhere in the house.
I pulled out the computer table, nearly broke my neck trying to look under the fridge, crawled round the kitchen on all fours looking under everything that was not flush with the floor - no guilty secrets, just a few spiders.
I repeated my under-furniture searchings in the living room, including raising the recliners to look into their interiors, in case something had got inside them and died.
The bedroom, the shower room and the bathroom were likewise subjected to intense floor-level scrutiny.
The smell didn’t seem to originate from anywhere specific in the house - it simply seemed to be following me around, so logically it must originate from me - or hopefully my dress. I sniffed the dress, clean on that morning. It seemed innocent of any unpleasant pong, but nevertheless I changed it and secreted it in the linen bin, ready for washing when the electricity was cheap (er).
So it wasn’t anything dead under the furniture. It wasn’t my clean-on-that-morning dress - it has to be me!
Despite having had a thorough wash only hours before I showered, and put on another clean dress.
The smell remained. I was stumped. I sought enlightenment in cookery; I had some finishings-up to get together, so I was going to make a sort of pie thing consisting of everything in a bowl and covered with mashed potato.
I opened the bag containing the potatoes - and nearly fell over at the noxious stench that emerged.
I rallied bravely and examined the potatoes; there were 4 of them, all of the small new variety. 3 were quite perky, but the fourth was rotten.
I’d found the source of the smell - but how could the stench of one small rotten potato, securely sealed inside a bag permeate the house so completely?
Good thing it was only a small potato!
