You will enjoy todays tale from Jos Biggs . Enjoy.
Funny How Things Turn Out
We had forgotten to renew our house insurance, due the following day. However we were off on holiday early, and without said insurance it was an absolute certainty that we would get burgled, or the house would burn down, or both. Pete gave the multi-talented Andy some money and pleaded that he would go in on the morrow and renew the insurance for us.
We departed for Portugal in an atmosphere of calm relaxation, but as we were enjoying the architectural magnificence of Jerez de Los Caballeros’s Cathedral our mobile rang.
‘Hello, it’s (name redacted) Are you in?’
‘No.’
‘Will you be out long?’
‘About a week.’
‘Oh.’
‘Why?’
‘We’re at Almeria airport, and I’ve forgotten our Spanish house keys. I left them in England.’
‘No panic. Andy has our house keys; he can go into our house and get your spare keys. They are in (location redacted)’
End of conversation.
Half a Plaza later: ‘We’ve been to Andy’s house and he’s out. Have you got his number so that I can ring him and ask him when he’ll be back?’
‘Yes, but it’s on my phone. You’ll have to ring off, and ring back again in 5 minutes, when I’ve found it.’
Now all I had to do was find someone with a pen I could borrow, search the internals of the mobile for Andy’s number and then write it down – no chance of me remembering it, even for 5 minutes!
5 minutes later the phone rang. I passed Andy’s number on, handed back the borrowed pen and relaxed.
15 minutes later the phone rang again. ‘Andy was out renewing your house insurance. He’s back now, and we are outside your house. Where did you say the keys were? I’ve forgotten and he doesn’t know.’’
‘They are in the (location redacted)’
End of conversation. Crisis over, until: ‘We’re in your house, but we can’t find them. We’ve looked everywhere.’
‘They are in the (location redacted. Detailed directions given.) They’re attached to a keyring with a pistol on it.’
Short pause. ‘Got them.’
The conversation ended, and stayed that way.
So if we hadn’t forgotten our house insurance: Andy would have gone to the beach instead of Albox, so would not have been within hailing distance.
And (name redacted) would either have had to stand outside her house all day waiting for his return.
Or phone me yet again for the number of Phil the Pick!
Funny how things turn out!
