Another tale from Jos Biggs to make you smile on this hot Sunday !!
It didn’t sound the most difficult job in the world.
Angie and Martin, my neighbours from 2 doors up, were returning after a Covid-enforced 3 year absence, and Angie had emailed to ask me to turn the fridge/freezer on.
So with their house key in hand I sauntered sweatily up to their house. In my other hand I had a spray can of WD40 - I was as prepared as the best Boy Scout for the lock to have stiffened up with lack of usage and 3 years of sun.
I sprayed the lock and the key liberally, put the key in the lock and turned it. Or I would have done, but it wouldn’t.
I gave it another spray and another futile turn.
I looked at it and cogitated.
I sprayed it for a third time and pulled the door towards me as I failed yet again to turn the key. So I pushed the door; what a waste of effort!
I gave the door a hefty smacking. I swore at it. It remained just as shut.
My maxim in Life is; If at first you don’t succeed, get someone else to do it.
With this in mind I begged assistance from next door. It arrived promptly and willingly in the form of Nick, who can make 6 foot 4 seem inadequate.
He sprayed the lock. He worried the key back and forth. He pushed the door. He pulled the door. He gave it a hefty smacking.
I stood and watched, uttering words of encouragement and becoming aware of a hitherto unknown feeling. I am not short, but as I stood next to this large and perfectly formed man I felt like a pygmy at a Giant’s Convention.
The door remained obdurate, and we remained outside with a much emptier can of spray.
‘Let’s try the back door.’ Opined Nick, so we traipsed round and began negotiations with the back door.
The foe might have changed, but the battle was still the same, and we weren’t winning.
However, I was thinking ahead. ‘Nick,’ I said, ‘We don’t have the key for the rejas, so even if we do manage to open this door we won’t be any better off. I can’t fit through those rejas, and you certainly can’t.’
He paused momentarily. ‘No.’ He answered, ‘but the children can.’
We are no longer allowed to send children up chimneys, but encouraging them through rejas is apparently still permitted!
Addendum: Nick got the door open - eventually!
Courage, amigos, amigas! If we make it through today and tomorrow hopefully we will be over the worst!
